Have a weight-loss tip? Email editor@dailySpark.com

Poll: Does Your Body Image Change With Your Weight?

By: Dean Anderson : 9/1/2009 6:24:49 AM : 166 comments : 10,579 Views

We all know it’s very easy to develop a negative body image when we feel like our own bodies don’t match up very well with media images of the “perfect” body. Sometimes, even very minor imperfections can be the source of much dissatisfaction.

And I imagine that most of us who set out to lose weight and/or improve our fitness are hoping that our body image will improve as our body changes.

But is that what always happens? Does body image improve along with your BMI score?

Apparently not for a lot of people, according to this article from MSNBC. Especially those who lose a lot of weight or those who have a history of losing and regaining weight several times. Most people who lose weight report more satisfaction with their bodies and what they can do, but this doesn't always translate into improved body image.

For some, their "new" body never feels quite real, as if they're not sure the weight loss and increased fitness will last very long. Others literally can't "see" their bodies as they are now--they still see the "phantom fat" that used to be there.

The linked article offers some information about why these problems may happen, but maybe the most important question here is what people can do when they find themselves still feeling uncomfortable in their own skin even after weight loss.

When I think about my own body image issues, it seems like I have more than one body image floating around in my head. How I’m seeing my body at the moment depends a lot on what I’ve been doing recently. If I’m eating well and exercising regularly, I see myself in my mind’s eye as being relatively healthy and fit, and I see my body as “normal.” I’m not very self-conscious about my appearance, even though I know I’m a long ways from being thin or buff. I can put on my compression biking shorts, muffintop and all, and head out into the world without giving a second thought to what someone else might think about this fashion choice.

But when I’m not eating well or exercising, this all changes pretty dramatically. I start seeing myself the way I used to when I was well over 125 pounds heavier. I get very self-conscious, don’t want anyone to look at me, and wouldn’t even think about wearing my bike shorts in public. I feel like my body is about as un-normal as you can get. If my weight goes up a couple pounds on the scale, these feelings and thoughts just get worse.

So, it seems that losing all that weight didn’t entirely change my body image. It doesn’t take a lot to make those old feelings and thoughts about my body come roaring back to the surface again. But, fortunately, it also doesn’t take much to get myself back into a more realistic and positive frame of mind—I just need to do something healthy for myself, whether it’s eating better, doing some exercise, or finding another way to de-stress about all this.

For me, the best antidote to negative feelings about my body is to treat myself as if I respect and care about my physical self, even when I may not feel that way at the moment.

Maybe someday I’ll get to the psychological roots of all those old feelings, and get rid of those demons once and for all. But if not, at least I know how to handle them when they do come up.

What’s your story? Does how you feel about your body change according to your weight or clothing size? Has losing weight made a major difference in how you see yourself, or is it hard for you to see your body as it is now? What do you do to maintain a positive attitude toward yourself when those negative thoughts start coming up?

Click here to to redeem your SparkPoints

You will earn 3 SparkPoints

NEXT ENTRY > We Ate It: Cranberry Raisinets

Comments (Scroll to end to leave a comment)

SISSYSNOOKS 9/6/2010 8:24:20 PM	My body image seems to get better as I lose weight, but I still have a long ways to go and not yet happy with my body. I am hopeful though and I def. feel better than I did 80 lbs ago.	166
KWRIGHT26 3/3/2010 3:10:09 PM	I do it. When I get on the scale, even if it's during the week instead of my official once-a-week weigh in, and its up even a pound, I get that fat feeling. I'll give up dressing cute that day and cover up in my biggest sweatshirt (not such a bad thing since it's so darn cold right now), and I even walk, stand, and sit differently, like I'm trying to shrink down and not be noticed.	165
HAPPYTEX 1/12/2010 10:01:54 PM	I view my body positively. I've been working out for years and stay in pretty good shape, even though since I quit working about five years ago, I've gained about twenty pounds. Still, not bad for a 72 year-old granddad. I want to lose those pounds because I feel better at my correct weight. Now, it's for more than just that. I had a pacemaker inserted about a month ago, and I will never be able to work out the same way again. For the first time in my life, I won't lift over 50 pounds at a time. Obviously, I can only tone up, work for definition. I will become smaller, which I don't want, but I will still, I think, have a good feeling about my body. As I've said befotre, my body doesn't define me. There's more to me than my body.	164
4A-HEALTHY-BMI 12/7/2009 9:40:21 AM	I have no idea what size I am, anymore. And I don't mean the number on the tag in my clothes. It's very disorienting.	163
LOLOBEAR1 12/5/2009 2:14:30 AM	I find that since I've lost weight, I crave someone noticing it or commenting on it, I guess to validate it. That affects how I see myself. Somedays I still look in the mirror and just see flab. Other days I think wow, looking good. Depends on the day! Depends on the outfit. So my body image fluctuates from good to bad with no rhyme or reason. As C. Rosie said earlier, when her sister lost weight, she ended up looking the same, only smaller. I have that same body type (& the same sister, lol). But I also agree with her about looking at food & exercise for your health & not just to look good. Nowadays I try looking at food simply as nutrition, as it helps to separate the emotional connection to eating, and the bad choices that go along with it. Sometimes I think I am too restrictive as to what I am allowing myself to eat, but at this point, I'm not ready to lose that control.	162
AJCAOUETTE 10/19/2009 11:44:20 PM	my body image gets worse as i loose weight. i recently left treatment for an ED and i can say that while i was not comfortable at the weight i was at when i left, a health weight and one that would still qualify me as thing, my boday image was certainly better than when i was 30 pounds smaller, weighing in at 64% of my ideal body weight.	161
3RDENCOUNTER 10/15/2009 8:32:22 PM	I've had the same feelings. I have lost 34 lbs but have 10lbs to go but can't shake the overweight feelings even though I get compliments from co-workers.	160
MARGOMCP 10/4/2009 12:18:39 PM	My body image of myself is as I was in my mid-20's, young, healthy, "handsome" and 112 pounds lighter. Since I'm not likely to look like that at the age of 60; don't know what I'm going to do when I get back to a healthy weight. I think I'll settle for less denial when I catch myself in store windows and do a double-take?	159
FITITGIRL 9/22/2009 7:45:32 AM	True, When I was in my goal weight I didnot appreciate how I looked like, but now I am yearning to get back to that weight.. wierd, but true.. I am learning to accept me as I am now..	158
WHEELS54 9/17/2009 1:48:57 PM	I think that part of the reason the I did not have a good self-image before I started this lifestyle change is that I felt out of control. I feel like I have a normal relationship with food now. I lost 15 and would like to lose 20 more but I feel pretty good about myself now. I know that I am the same person inside at any weight and joining SP has given me a great deal on insight on the struggles and prejudices that overweight and obese people face every day.	157
MYSTICRAINS 9/16/2009 7:29:36 PM	0 self confidence. All I can think is of the 92 lbs left to lose	156
TCJC624 9/12/2009 7:36:45 PM	absolutely, it is sad but it is true	155
KATBWIN 9/10/2009 3:41:24 PM	It is hard to know which came first. My weight has been going up and my feelings and my energy have been going down. I am an energetic starter, not a good maintainer in the middle. Therefore, I never reach the end. This time around I am starting small and hope to be able maintain.	154
MAYBER 9/10/2009 12:11:57 PM	have always had a good body image because I sit and walk tall even though the weight has been added I still think of myself as much slimmer than I am	153
CIERAPOET 9/9/2009 3:54:00 PM	Sometimes I am on top of the world with the weight I have lost, especially when I go home and see those that have not seen me in a while and get all of these great compliments. Then at the same time I am with others who do not notice the weight loss and I get in "fat girl mode" and try to make jokes that are not really funny to be the life of someone else's party. The end is that I am hurt and upset and leave in tears, although no one notices that I am gone. Just like the old "fat girl". I wonder, will this mind set ever end for me. I thank my God that His love is always unconditional and that being healthy is my choice and I am beautiful regardless. My thoughts about myself will improve just like my weight loss goals will improve. I accept me for me at this time in my life and I am beautiful right now!!!	152
KATE4HEALTH 9/9/2009 6:44:51 AM	This is a fascinating topic. As I gradually gained 40 pounds I fluctuated between feeling fat and out of control, to very normal, depending on the articles of clothing I wore, the compliments I received and how I happened to feel in general. As I was losing weight (currently 29 pounds), I felt wonderful and very thin (compared to my former body shape). Currently I notice I lost that feeling of thinness. It seems the original rush and thrill of the wt. loss has gone away and I have grown accustomed to being a samller size. Although I feel great...more fit and more in control, I'm noticing this skewed opinion of myself when I look in the mirror or see a current picture of myself. My overall goal is to feel good and good to me means in control of my food intake....flexible, strong and healthy. I'll continue to pay attention to how I can fool myself about how I look depending on my mood in the moment.	151
BETTII 9/8/2009 5:55:07 PM	I feel best when I'm fit which means I'm at my thinner weight. A book that I've been reading called Love Your Body, Love Your Life by Sarah Maria has really helped me to overcome negative beliefs about myself. It shows you how to create a body and a life that you love. I'd highly recommend it. http://www.breakfreebeauty.com /	150
PRINCESSMANDIE 9/8/2009 1:18:53 PM	I am one of those that sees the Phantom Fat. I have Body Dysmorphia. When I was 16 (I'm 28 now) I was put on Steriods for medicinal reasons. One of the side affects is "ballooning" of the face and body not to mention the increased appetite. At 16 I was already awkward not to mention the illness I was dealing with and the side affects of the medicines I was taking. Due to the steriods I gained 60 lbs in 3 months. I wasn't much heavier at that time than I am now but in my Senior Prom pictures I look like I'm about 230 lbs. When I see the number on the scale now even if I'm skinny, I still remember what I looked like back then. It's a tough issue to deal with and some days it takes A LOT of talking to myself to realize that it was a side affect NOT the real me. It's a work in progress but I'm working on it.	149
CROBINGO 9/8/2009 10:29:14 AM	Absolutely my body image changes with my weight. That is not my personal image as I truly like myself, but my image of how I look and even how I dress changes with my weight.	148
CHRIS3215 9/8/2009 9:54:29 AM	I was big all my life & now that I at last lost the weight I feel & look like a totally different person. I have a whole new look on life & I also have tons of hindsight to boot.. It will soon be 8yrs that I have kept the weight off I intend on keeping it off & improving more every day!!	147
IR5676 9/8/2009 9:27:12 AM	Since my weight has slowly increased over the years, I didn't really feel too different, but since I really hit the perimenopause years, I feel like I've ballooned! I think I look fat, or at least, out of shape, even though my husband denies it (bless him!). Since I have one month left before menopause (YEA!), I'm determined to get back into shape and lose about 40 lbs!	146
DEE0973 9/8/2009 9:16:34 AM	I do feel a lot better about my body. I'm more open to wearing certain items because I've lost weight and toned up. Everyone looks at me and calls me skinny, I don't see that b/c there's more pounds to be lost. I believe that if I didn't have a pouch I wouldn't care to lose more weigth, but being a mother of two I've accepted that I'll never have a flat tummy	145
BLUEBERRYPI 9/7/2009 11:14:23 PM	At this point I do not feel as heavy as I am and i'm thinking that may be why I haven't done as much as I should have for my weight issue, and that I beleive is why in spite of health issues continuing to creep up, I still gained weight. Not deleiberately but I didn't put it in check as soon as I should have. I have never had a poor body image. I don't understand some of the self hate that some people seem to be burdened with. We have enough issues to deal with in this society. I 've always liked the way I looked, so did my husband, regardless of the weight increase. I was always taught as a child to be proud of who I am, that was before the weight gain, thank God that lesson was ingrained!! I still believe I'm an attractive person but one who needs to seriously get the excess weight off.	144
TACDGB 9/7/2009 4:41:54 PM	I have a real hard time getting this fat image out of my head. I am a size 3 and somedays I feel real fat. I feel like I did years ago when I weighed almost 200 pounds. And other days I feel just fine. But most of the time I feel so fat.	143
TIGGER1992 9/7/2009 2:42:51 PM	I always feel bigger than I am. Before I lost weight, I decided to do it because I felt huge and had had enough! Now I have lost most of the weight that I wanted to lose - I want to have a "healthy BMI" and am almost there, although I think that the last 10 pounds is going to be difficult. The thing that REALLY makes me feel that I have a healthy body though is the fact that I can now jog longer and farther than I ever used to be able. I can do more sit ups and push ups than I ever used to be able. And every now and then I make a point of looking at the label on my jeans, although I can't believe what I see, it isn't a double digit number! But even with all this, I still forget sometimes and feel like my old BIG self! Keep exercising! Keep up the good work! Be Healthy!	142
LANNBOL22 9/7/2009 12:38:27 PM	I used to be thin, and then after I had my kids I was "overweight" according to medical standards, but I never thought of myself as "fat" then. I have always been the smallest in my family, until about 2 years ago. I have always had people around who told me I wasn't fat (except my doctor, lol). So when I gained 80 pounds over the last 4 years, I knew I was obese, but in my mind I was still thin, or at least thinner. Everytime I look in the mirror I am surprised by how big my face is, or my belly. Maybe that is why it took me so long to be committed to losing weight. I had other excuses, sure, but deep down, I am a thin person at heart and soul. I am starting to lose weight now and as my weight goes down, my confidence goes up as well as my image of myself. I am going to reach that goal weight and be the person that I really am on the inside.	141
SWEET_DEVOTION 9/7/2009 12:11:55 PM	When I look in the mirror and I'm wearing a new top and I look thinner, I feel better about myself. However, when the shirt comes off and I am faced with the harsh reality of flab and rolls, it goes way down. I'm not happy with my appearance and I wish the body underneath the clothes looked as good when the clothes come off, or when I wear something tighter. I suppose all I can do is work on it. I think body image has a major part in weight loss, for some the image they see effects whether or not they go for that tub of ice-cream. I tend to try to shy away from it when I feel that way, but I will munch on just about anything else. A vicious cycle that I intend to break.	140
GIANT-STEPS 9/7/2009 11:15:16 AM	I always feel smaller than I am. When I hit my peak of about 315 I felt a little overweight rather than morbidly obese. Of course reality would set in when I tried to do something a fitter person would do like hike up a mountain.	139
GEE-KNEE 9/7/2009 11:10:43 AM	I was 340 pounds when I signed up for spark people, and I really signed up hoping for some added energy, but then started losing weight. My body image was not too bad to begin with. I knew I was obese, but I knew that did not define who I was. I was thankful that I was all functional, with no health issues. I've lost 130 pounds so far, and my body image has improved. I just feel younger, and stronger. I feel healthier. I can fit in "normal" sized clothing. Those changes have raised my self confidence. I have my moments, but in general I am feeling good about myself. I even wore my swimsuit in public this summer, even though I did not feel horribly bad about myself that is something I would have NEVER done before.	138
ME-ELIZABETH 9/7/2009 10:53:30 AM	Yes I think it does a lot but when I am taking care of myself better I feel better too and that is much more important then my body imagine.	137
SKINNYJEENS 9/7/2009 8:33:49 AM	I always feel bigger than I am. I have been a yo-yo for a while with my weight going up and down about 15 or so which on a short frame is a difference of 2 sizes or so. When I am at my smallest it still doesn't feel small enough but when I am bigger I wonder why I didn't think it my smaller size was good enough. This time when I get there again I'm going to appreciate it so much more.	136
KATAKITOMOTSIN 9/6/2009 11:41:59 PM	I feel much better about myself when I am thinner. I feel more comfortable in my body and have more self-confidence. I hate being overweight. I hate the fact I let myself be so careless as to get that way in the first place. I want to be the best me I can. For myself and for my family.	135
MRS.MELINDA 9/6/2009 1:51:44 PM	I feel a lot better when I'm thinner, however tend not to mind my weight as much if I am being healthy and still not at my goal weight. For example, now I'm being healthy, and while not at goal, don't care if other people like my fashion choices or think I have a muffin top.	134
CATHWREN 9/5/2009 8:07:49 PM	At this point I don't feel as fat as I actually am so I'm shocked if I accidentally see myself in a mirror or photo. But I suspect that when I lose the extra person in my body, I won't really see myself as slim either. I didn't before I gained weight so why would I after knowing how big I've gotten. That doesn't really make sense because between slim to fat and fat to slim should give a different perspective. But who ever said people have realistic perspectives? 8~)	133
BERGIE8771 9/5/2009 5:24:02 PM	Well I have to say that my body image is still that of the THIN me. I am 175 lbs over what I weighed in college. I still have a pair of shorts that I used to wear when working out. I was a competitive athlete on scholarship. Now these shorts look (to me) like they belong to a 5yr old. Nowdays when I pass by a window or mirror I see this heavy person and wonder who it is, and find it's me! I can't seem to get my picture of myself from about 20 yrs ago out of my head. I guess it works both ways!!!	132
*AMBER512 9/5/2009 1:12:49 PM	I know my stomach is different (I mean I went from a size 28 to a size 12). But the rest of my body is different, too. So my stomach sticks out just as much as it always has. People want me to think of myself as a success for losing 95 pounds, but all I can seem to see is my stomach hanging out. And not a little bit like in the blog about the picture in Glamour. She and I may be the same size, but my stomach is twice hers. Women have been accepting their flaws "so what if I have a droopy stomach? I have X amount of beautiful children!" Well...I don't ! I don't have any children. I have no good reason to have such a large stomach except that I once weighed 245 pounds. I don't actually sound this pathetic in real life, I promise. Just something about waking up feeling really down this morning, seeing the scale go up, and then reading this blog....I just can't seem to think of myself as a smaller person. Especially since my body is perfectly comfortable staying a size 12. This is where it is stuck. I try to think of my blessings each day. So I know that I am very lucky to be alive and to have a body that can do what it can do. But even I can get totally plagued by what my scale says. I guess to make the story short : I can relate!	131
HURLEY862 9/5/2009 12:06:37 PM	I can totally related to the "phantom fat" feeling. I went from 160 pounds to 120, and when I look in the mirror I think "I know I've lost all that weight, how can I possibly look the same?" Then I see a picture of myself when I was heavy and am shocked! It's just mind-blowing how much bigger I was, but I just don't see it when I look in the mirror.	130
MINI-ME2BE 9/5/2009 10:45:36 AM	I think it's so much easier for us all to see the negative image of ourselves. That's what we need to work on - turn around - modify - whatever it takes. For myself I have a better image of myself but still look at the bigger me rather than m;y accomplishments. Maybe it's our driving force to keep us going toward our goals... I don't know but the negativity can't be good either.	129
FIT-NUTMAMA 9/5/2009 12:58:44 AM	I hate my body right now, but I also know that loosing weight won't change that opinion of myself. Only I can change that opinion of myself. My self image has a lot to do with the fact that I've let myself forget who I am. Being fat is only a portion of that image. Loosing the weight won't change it, but it will help. I have a long road to travel to have the self confidence in myself to like what I see when I look in the mirror.	128
DANGEL117 9/5/2009 12:55:42 AM	I have never been happy with my physical appearance! When I was youung in High School and weighed 98 pounds I thought I was a cow! When I weighed 180 and couldn't fit in the bathtub I thought I was a cow! Now that I'm down to 140 I still see myself the same in the mirror as when I was 180! A COW!	127
BILLALEX70 9/4/2009 9:36:25 PM	This is tough. I've still got that FAT image in my brain, but my pant size is now a 42. I see some of the dads at the football games and I'm like "I wish I was that size" and DW says I'm already that size. My image would probably change if I had some skin reduction done, but that's not happening right now. I've worked really hard to get to the point I'm at now and I'm proud of the body I've crafted, but I think that I'll always think of myself at fat.	126
IRENEHARPS 9/4/2009 8:32:15 PM	Once I begin to live a healthy lifestyle, I don't need to lose much weight....even though I need to....to begin to feel better about myself. I feel more energetic and well.....healthier. I believe it may have more to do with feeling proud of setting a goal and reaching for it with full determination.....seeing what I'm really made of.	125
SCRIBE4CHRIST 9/4/2009 7:25:52 PM	I would think it would have to. I know I have felt inferior and turned down for jobs because I am overweight. If a person is born without an arm or a leg, they are not discriminated against as much as an overweight person is - man or woman. If you're single, there is not much dating scene for you. We would all like to believe that beauty is only skin deep but we know thats not the truth. People are very shallow and will expect perfection even if they are not perfect themselves.	124
LADYAUTUMN 9/4/2009 4:17:39 PM	This is an excellent article. Sounds so much like me! My body image has never been the greatest but when I am eating right and EXERCISING I feel so much better!!! I have lost and gained several people over my life time - I just want to lose my excess weight and never gain it back. I prefer to gain friends and keep them but not on my body!	123
OFELIA37 9/4/2009 1:16:50 PM	Body image is a great issue, but sometimes if diet and exercise don't cut it, cosmetic surgery is a great way (if you can afford it), I have always been thin but after my 2 kids I was in good shape but my belly was loose, I did a tummy tuck with breast augmentation and the results were incredible, I now have a flat flat flat stomach ,25 inch waist, and my self steem and my marries life improved like 1000% believe me, self image is very important, and if plastic surgery is not for you, that's OK as long as you feel really good on the mirror, believe me, people notice your self confidence from blocks away. So I'm pretty motivated know to keep exercising and eating healthy, so try to do it as much as you can, losing weight is a tough thing to do but just don't think about it to much, just keep doing good things for your body and it will pay off. Just a final comment, I did not loose any weight at all with the procedure I'm still on the same 127 pounds that I have always been, it is just my figure has change so much.	122
UHURAUHURA 9/4/2009 9:11:59 AM	With Spark People I am on my way of loosing big weight for the 4th time in my life. All previous times I had gained it all again. I know how it is to be thin and feel thin. It makes up my day every day, I feel happy and content with myself. Everything seems to run better. However, this is only my outside dressed shelf. When I look myself at the mirror naked (in my thin times I mean) I realize that the shape of my body has not changed at all, I still have more fat where I used to have it, my belly has the same problems and moreover, as age always goes on, I encounter loose skin everywhere on my body. All these drive my psychology backwards and I know there isn't much I can do to repair them (except perhaps cosmetic surgery which I have decided not to do). When dressed up or when shopping for new clothes, then it is best time for me. I have some more weight to loose this time and I am following a very special exercise program the results of which are helping me and boosting my ego and self confidence. I surely hope and expect that these results will overcome the impression that the thin naked image of myself makes on my mind.- Uhura	121
MEIORI 9/4/2009 1:14:24 AM	I really still have an issue with being 'pretty' I never thought of myself as pretty, and now that I am, or at least I seem to be more to most people....well it doesn't quite match up in my head. I still get defensive, and I really have to watch myself, otherwise I go into that mode and think everyone hates me. I forget that people are people, some will like me, others wont, but I can't control what others thing anymore than they can control what I think. When I gain weight it worries me, but then it motivates me to try and lose it again.	120
XAPOWELL 9/3/2009 11:32:52 PM	Yes. Like most people, when I am living a healthier lifestyle I feel better. Because I gained most of my weight with my 1rst of 3 pregnancies 5 years ago, and have either been pregnant or breastfeeding since, I still, until recently, have had a little denial about my weight and thinking it is all "baby weight." Until recently, I did not even realize just how big I've become. I don't see it in the mirror, but in pictures, oh boy!!! It is crazy how I look back at old pictures when I was in the 130's and realize that I was a great weight, but back then I felt fat. Just nuts!	119
MRSKRISTINA 9/3/2009 9:26:12 PM	Unfortunately, yes. I know you should be comfortable in your own skin no matter how you look, but I just never have been. I have honestly never been at a healthy weight for as long as I can remember. I have constantly used food as a security blanket. Now, as I am losing weight and getting to the lowest number on the scale in years, I feel so much more confident. I don't feel as though everyone is just staring at my massive gut rolls or double chin when I talk- they are looking at me and listening to what I have to say.	118
ETERNAL4 9/3/2009 8:47:40 PM	I have lost 12 pounds and when my husband said he couldn't grab my love handles, or "wow your belly is smaller" or when he said "I can feel your stomach mustles when you laugh"...sure I notice it and I carry myself differently when I am smaller in size.	117